Another Art

The art of horseshit isn’t hard to master.
People crave some color along the way.
Besides, how could it lead to a disaster?

Start small.  Tell her your love will last forever.
At first it’s not an easy thing to say,
But horseshit’s not really hard to master.

Soon, though, you should take the whole thing farther.
How once you dined with Cher and Doris Day.
Amazing.  See?  This leads to no disaster.

Then tell about the time that as a golfer
You hustled Lee Trevino, made him pay.
The art of horseshit isn’t hard to master.

That scar? From Nam, when hunkered as a sniper,
You caught a bullet for a friend one day,
But, hey, you’re still alive—no great disaster.

Until before a judge and talking faster,
Now sworn to tell the truth, you’re forced to say
The art of horseshit isn’t hard to master,
Though it leads to (I lied!) complete disaster.